John Mayer is close friends with Watch What Happens Live host and TV producer Andy Cohen, and that friendship has apparently led some people to speculate that there’s something going on between Cohen, who is gay, and Mayer, who is straight. That subject came up in a recent Hollywood Reporter cover story on Cohen, and the question alone was enough to get Mayer to write in to the magazine.
In the Hollywood Reporter profile, co-editor in chief Maer Roshan tells Andy Cohen, “Your friendship with Mayer has been a subject of intense speculation. People seem dubious that a straight rock star can have a close platonic relationship with a gay TV personality.” Cohen responds, “Let them speculate! I honestly love John Mayer, and he loves me. But because we’re so affectionate toward each other, people don’t know what box to put that in. They assume we’re sleeping with each other, which we are most definitely not.”
That profile ran two days ago. Yesterday, The Hollywood Reporter noted that Mayer wrote a letter to Maer Roshan, basically saying that it’s weird to even ask if straight people and gay people can be friends with each other. Mayer writes, “I bristle at your selectively flimsy logic meant to coax an answer, when the premise itself is so deeply flawed, and quite possibly not even quantitatively true… Reinforcing the idea that any gay/straight relationship needs qualification that it’s not sexual devoids everyone involved of their dignity.”
Here’s the full text of Mayer’s response:
Hi Mr. Roshan,
I read your interview with Andy Cohen, and was intrigued by your line of questioning regarding our friendship. You posited that “your friendship with Mayer has been a subject of intense speculation. People seem dubious that a straight rock star can have a close platonic relationship with a gay TV personality.”
I think this is somewhat of a specious premise. First, there is a long and storied history of “rock stars” (not mocking, just won’t refer to myself as one) befriending gay icons and artists.
Second, I think that to suggest that people are dubious of a friendship like mine and Andy’s is to undermine the public’s ability to accept and understand diversity in all facets of culture, be it in art or in real life. I’d like to think they’re sophisticated enough to see a relationship like ours without assuming it must include a sexual component. That turns the concept of being gay into an ignorantly two-dimensional one, which I know you know it’s not. I don’t question that at all.
I love intelligent discourse — as I hope you’ll find this email to be — but I bristle at your selectively flimsy logic meant to coax an answer, when the premise itself is so deeply flawed, and quite possibly not even quantitatively true.
Quite simply, if someone is dubious of a platonic relationship between a straight man and a gay man, I don’t think that shallow a view deserves clarification by anyone with self respect, be it Andy or your publication. Reinforcing the idea that any gay/straight relationship needs qualification that it’s not sexual devoids everyone involved of their dignity.
Respectfully,
John Mayer