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2024 has already been a big year for Post Malone. He’s on the new albums from both Beyoncé and Taylor Swift, and his Swift collab “Fortnight” is likely to be the #1 song in America next week. He sang “America The Beautiful” at the Super Bowl, duetted with Eddie Vedder at a benefit show, and put a bunch of hardcore bands in a WWE video game. As far as his cinematic career goes, Posty played the zodiac sign Leo in Jennifer Lopez’s This Is Me… Now: A Love Story and an underground pit fighter in the first scene of the Road House remake. Now, he’s teaming up with garbage-cinema auteur Michael Bay for a new movie and maybe also a new cinematic universe.
According to a press release, Post Malone is working with Platinum Dunes, Michael Bay and Brad Fuller’s production company, on “an all-new IP universe” based on an original story from Post Malone. The project has something to do with Vault Comics, an independent horror-centric comics publisher, and it’s a “demonic horror” set in the middle ages, where “the only thing standing in the way of the horde of demons infesting the continent is a mysterious armored 18-wheeler seemingly sent back from the heavens.” That just sounds like Army Of Darkness with a truck instead of a car, but Army Of Darkness fucking rules, so I’ll allow it.
In a statement, Post Malone says, “I’m so pumped to share this badass story with the world, and I couldn’t ask for better partners than Michael Bay and Vault to help bring this story to life.” Vault will publish the story as a graphic novel in 2025, and the movie will follow afterwards. This seems like the type of shit that I would probably do if I suddenly became a gigantic pop star, so I suppose I must salute Post Malone for actually doing it.