Posted by Nick Cannon is paying tribute to NCredible artist Ryan Bowers.
Bowers, who recently released his Running With Scissors album, committed suicide earlier this week, days after Cannon posted cryptic messages on social media contemplating to do the same.
“Just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse… 2020 is definitely the most fucked up year I’ve ever witnessed,” Cannon wrote alongside a photo of him and Bowers together. “After waking up & barely rising from my own dark contemplation of continuing my physical existence on this planet, this powerful warrior actually had the balls to do it. I’ve said it once and I will say it again, this was the strongest dude I’ve ever met! ”
Cannon goes on to recount Bowers’ 2019 encounter with police. The 24-year-old had slit his throat and after a confrontation with San Diego police, an officer opened fire, striking Bowers in the chest. He was comatose for months before emerging from his state and regaining the ability to walk and record music again.
“Even through his strength he would whisper to me that “Everything Still Hurts”. His music was definitely his safe haven and it was amazing,” Cannon continued. “Paying for lawyers, putting money in his pocket, even putting the music together all meant nothing because I feel like I failed my little brother.”
He added, “I can’t help but think if I wasnt so engulfed in my own bullshit I could’ve been there for you when you finally took your life after several attempts… Fuck this place!!”
View this post on InstagramNick Cannon reacts to the death of Ryan Bowers and hints at Having suicidal thoughts. I truly hope that someone is checking on him ??❤️❤️❤️?? #celebrities #celebritynews #nickcannon #ncredibleentertainment #debmarmercury #wendywilliams #wendywilliamsshow #thewendywilliamsshow #wendyshow #wildnout #nickcannonpresentswildnout #teonnyspears #louisianablogger #somelikeithaute #nickcannontalkshow #talkshows #jessicawhite #brittanybell #mariahcarey #dembabies #goldengannon #MoroccanScottCannon #MonroeCannon #viacom #viacomcbs #mtv #mtv2 #vh1 #ryanbowers #themaskedsinger
Cannon’s sentiments were echoed by Kehlani who said she “begged” Bowers to continue fighting and not take his life.
” i understood you, and when it came down to me going back to my hometown to figure it out myself at one point i felt like you was the only person who understood ME,” she wrote on Instagram. “our last conversation will haunt me forever. you know why. i can understand why, i just wish it wasn’t like this.”
View this post on Instagramwe stayed up every night together craaaackinnn the fuuuuck uppppp and talked about “making it” when we lived at Chaz house. sneaking and smoking on the roof at the Ncredible office everyday. really horrible freestyles. i understood you, and when it came down to me going back to my hometown to figure it out myself at one point i felt like you was the only person who understood ME. our last conversation will haunt me forever. you know why. i can understand why, i just wish it wasn’t like this. my heart is broken. i thought shit couldn’t no sicker and it just did. i begggggged you bro ? you are at peace and that’s all i can find any sort of peace in myself. i can’t believe i’m writing this. rest in peace to a real fighter… my real fam… i love you Ryan. ???? fuck this year… on everything.
The news of Bowers’ death has made for an already turbulent week for Cannon, who was axed from ViacomCBS following anti-semitic comments he made on his Cannon’s Class podcast and learned that his daytime talk show would be delayed until 2021.
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Cannon announced that he would be taking a hiatus from his Power 106 radio show to further commit himself to “more profound learning” and “strengthening the bond between the Black and Jewish cultures every day going forward.”
“Morning radio family. I have decided to take some time away from my radio show so I can commit myself to deeper, more thorough reflection and education,” Cannon wrote on Twitter. “I will use this time to establish an action plan towards real, impactful change and advocacy aimed at bringing people together.”
In a statement, Meruelo Media, Power 106’s parent company confirmed Cannon’s hiatus.
“While the remarks were not part of our radio content, nor lived on any of the platforms associated with Meruelo Media, as a minority-owned media company, we take these matters very seriously,” the statement read. “Nick has decided to take some time off to reflect and create an action plan. Meruelo Media supports his decision and his process of reflection. As such, The Nick Cannon Morning show on KPWR Power 106 will be on hiatus for the near term.
“Meruelo Media condemns all expressions of hate, racism, bigotry and anti-Semitism.”
Morning radio family. I have decided to take some time away from my radio show so I can commit myself to deeper, more thorough reflection and education.
— Nick Cannon (@NickCannon) July 16, 2020