Fine, Here’s The Corpse Paint Cosmetics Ad

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Look. We know. Big companies have been using subcultural fashion to market consumer goods since before any of us were born. Also, Norwegian black metal, with its extreme backstories and its all-encompassing aesthetic, has been fodder for jokes since the music first came into existence in the ’90s. If anything, some big makeup company should’ve started selling corpse paint at least 20 years ago. But now, we’re really looking at a reality where kids have been granted the chance to dress up as murderous Scandinavian Satanists, and there’s some beauty in that.

It’s not remotely surprising that Liquid Death would be involved in mass-marketed corpse paint. Liquid Death started off selling canned water to straight-edge people as an alternative to IPAs or whatever. It seemed like a joke at the time — a company using goofy self-aware marketing and hardcore culture to sell what was basically Dasani. Now, I see entire shelves full of the stuff whenever I’m at Kroger. They know how to do this.

So Liquid Death has teamed up with e.l.f. Cosmetics to sell a five-piece makeup vault in a tiny little coffin. (I’d always seen it written as “corpsepaint,” one word, but I guess we’re going with “corpse paint” now.) The $34 set is already sold out, but the damn commercial keeps popping up in our social-media feeds. So here it is, in all its Too Many Cooks-ass glory:

I feel very bad for the first black metal band that puts on corpse paint after this ad came out.